Thanks for the offer of help, LakeRat. I'm a pretty advanced user and have 4 tickets open, pay for callback support (with a callback request), the whole nine yards. I need a dreamhost employee to enable something that only a dreamhost employee can, but they have been radio silent save a live chat person that could only say they will try to get someone on the team to respond. I was hoping someone might notice, this is not a small website!
Also, I should clarify -- one of the tickets is the call for help (the 5 day old one), the rest are 'please help me with that first ticket!' requests. I only go to support as a last resort and have been a customer support rep that replies to tickets just like these.