As a matter of fact I'd have no problem at all using this exact script on a website, except I couldn't find it available for download. wwwthreads moved onto more "convention" PHP based solutions. They apparently sold this extremely low-overhead, high-performance, zero-exploits PERL version. Thanks for asking
PHPBB is fantastic on low usage sites. I don't have the figures, but I'm betting this board gets amazing hits. Make a post with something new in it and within an hour it is first in Google. Use Newsfeeds? I do! The ammount of data sent out through here would be absolutely fantastic. I love my PHPBB3, but it would fail in minutes here fellas. Soon as an exploit is discovered this site would be down for us all. You know it, I know it, Dreamhost knows it.
Maybe you could get DH to consider implementing a few changes to the software already in place to brighten things up a bit? I'm sure they have quality PERL coders available for the task. Switching the software entirely is likely something they won't consider a priority.
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How To Install PHP.INI / ionCube on DreamHost